Will counselling work for me?


If you have never personally experienced counselling you might be wondering what makes people decide to have counselling and also if it would work for you. Perhaps you would like to know a bit more about it but in a way that you can understand. This article tries to do exactly that, to explain more about counselling and how it works in an easy to read way. We hope to help you decide if you would like to become one of a growing number of people who benefit from counselling.

People come to counselling for many different reasons:

  • Feeling low, depressed or anxious
  • Struggling with difficult family or work issues
  • Having experienced a loss or bereavement
  • With a desire to change something they don’t like about themselves
  • To feel listened to
  • To understand themselves better
  • For stress management
  • For personal growth
  • Or for many other reasons

So back to the original question: Will counselling work for me?  Many people come to counselling expecting that we can wave a magic wand or give them advice on what to do. Sadly, this is not the case. Accessing counselling can be beneficial but several things do need to be considered.

What brings you to counselling?

Counselling very much depends on why a person wants it in the first place. If you have suffered bereavement, then likely what you are seeking from counselling is the space to come to terms with your loss. To be able to share that loss with someone else, who can emphasise and be with you in your grief. You might also need to adjust to the change that the loss has created and work out how you fit into this new different life. Talking this over in confidence, with someone who is completely unbiased and non-judgemental can really help.

If you are struggling with an ongoing issue that you want to change, this may well involve some difficult work looking at the role you play and what you can change. Normally changes can only come from within you. If for example, if you are experiencing relationship problems, you may want your partner to change but realistically, no one can force someone else to change. It could be that the only person in the relationship who is prepared to make the changes is you. Acknowledging this may involve difficult decisions, emotions and work. Talking this over in a safe and confidential environment with someone you trust can help immensely.

It may be that your anxiety gets in the way of you doing the things you would like to do. By looking at how your thoughts affect your emotions and behaviour in a safe and friendly environment, you could be helped to find new ways of thinking that assist you to enhance your life. We have several different ways of working with this type of issue, including using some CBT (Cognitive Behaviour Therapy) techniques.

What are you expecting to gain from counselling?

How well counselling works for you, depends greatly on your expectations when entering counselling. It is important when you begin counselling that we explore your expectations, and then collaboratively work together to achieve your goals.

Counselling gives you the time to talk through your issues. It’s somewhere you can bounce off your thoughts on someone else without feeling judged or being criticised. It’s a place to feel listened to and also to grow in self-awareness. Collaboratively, counsellors and clients work together to provide a space where a new perspective can be sought, without the fear that others might find out about your personal thoughts or worries.

So how can we help you?

Talk-in-Herts Counselling Service is a group practice. All our qualified counsellors are members of the British Association for Counselling and Psychotherapy (BACP) and adhere to their ethical framework. We each have different specialisms, experience or additional qualifications. Between us we have worked with clients who have suffered loss and bereavement, trauma, domestic violence, anxieties, addictions, depression or parenting issues, to name just a few.

Our clientele include young people over 13 years old, parents, families, individuals, groups and those who prefer to work online. Whoever you are and for whatever the reason, we aim to help you and if we can’t, we will signpost you to someone who can. We welcome enquiries, so please do contact us for more information. It could help you make that wished for change, or come to a decision about something that’s been bothering you for ages. Why not give it a try?